The Chickens, fiction by Jim Nichols

Arnold walked up the new­ly-plowed dirt road, feel­ing the brit­tle cold on his face, look­ing ahead at the cross­ing framed by high, clean snow banks. He knew that a week was prob­a­bly not long enough to stay away, but he was tired of wait­ing for the bus by him­self. His aunt would just have to live with it. He clumped in his rub­ber boots up to the tar road and crossed to the oth­er side. His cousins – snow­suits, red cheeks, plum­ing breath – watched him drop his paper bag beside their array of lunch box­es in the packed snow.

Julie, the nicest cousin, said, "Hi, Arnold."

Arnold said, "Hi."

Lin­da, the old­est cousin, stood atop the snow­bank with her hands on her hips. "I thought you weren't allowed up here any more," she said.

"It's a free country."

"It's pri­vate property."

"Not the road."

Arnold's cousin Mark climbed the snow­bank from the oth­er side and looked down at him with­out speak­ing. Arnold won­dered if he was still mad about their fight. He knew his aunt was: he could see her star­ing at him out the kitchen win­dow. As he watched she turned and spoke to some­one he couldn't see. Then Uncle Mike came out­side, dressed for work. He backed his car out of the dri­ve­way, drove for­ward and rolled down the pas­sen­ger win­dow. He had jet-black hair and a sharp nose, like Arnold's moth­er. Like Arnold, too. All the cousins looked more like their moth­er, with light brown hair.

"Arnold," Uncle Mike said, "I'm sur­prised to see you here."

Arnold shrugged his shoulders.

"It's only been a week," Uncle Mike said.

Arnold looked down at his boots, looked back up when his uncle said, "Well, what do you think, Mark? You being the injured par­ty and all."

"I don't care," Mark said. He raised a mit­ten, touched under his right eye.

Arnold wished now he hadn't socked him. But Mark shouldn't have said he was stu­pid, either.

"All right," Uncle Mike said. "But Arnold, you need to keep your hands to yourself. "

"Okay," Arnold said.

His uncle stared, like he was still think­ing it over. Final­ly he straight­ened behind the wheel and let the car idle toward the road. When it was even with the big snow bank he stuck his hand out the win­dow and waved over the roof of the car.

"Bye Dad­dy!" the cousins all cried.

The Ply­mouth turned onto the tar road, and the cousins walked out to watch, the legs of their snow­suits whis­per­ing togeth­er. Then Julie point­ed in the oppo­site direc­tion and yelled, "Bus com­ing!" and they hus­tled back, grab­bing their lunch­box­es and lin­ing up accord­ing to age. The bus came hiss­ing to a stop and Mrs. Har­ri­son lev­ered open the door. Arnold fol­lowed Mark up the steps and along the aisle toward the Hurd broth­ers, who lived down the tar road toward Route 1 and always got on first. Mark said, "Hey," to them and slid into the seat oppo­site. He didn't move over, so Arnold kept going and took the next seat.

The door fold­ed shut; the bus low-geared into a turn onto the dirt road. Arnold sat back, watch­ing Mark smile at the Hurds. Arnold called them the Turds, but Mark didn't think that was fun­ny any more. Mark liked them now. He'd even been invit­ed over to their house. Arnold still thought they were sissies, though. They had blond hair and long eye­lash­es. They wore gloves instead of mit­tens and were always read­ing books. Tim Hurd had his eyes glued to a book now, hold­ing it close to his face. His head nod­ded as the bus bumped down the dirt road, but he kept right on read­ing, snap­ping a page over.

Arnold leaned for­ward and said, "Whatcha reading?"

Tim Hurd briefly turned the cov­er toward him: Herb Kent, West Point Fullback.

"So you think you're gonna be a foot­ball play­er?" Arnold said.

"Not par­tic­u­lar­ly," Tim Hurd said.

"Not par­tic­u­lar­ly!" Arnold mim­ic­ked, with a look at Mark. But Mark just moved impa­tient­ly on the seat. Arnold reached out and poked Tim Hurd in the arm. "Tim­my Turd, West Point Full­back!" he said.

The bus rat­tled along.

Tim Hurd's broth­er turned and said, "Why don't you lay off him, Arnold?"

"Why don't you make me?" Arnold said.

Tom Hurd bounced around for­ward. He looked out the win­dow at the low lit­tle house set back from the road, where Arnold lived with his moth­er. As they drew clos­er he whis­pered some­thing to his broth­er, who took one hand off his book long enough to smoth­er a laugh.

"What's so fun­ny, Tom­my Turd?" Arnold said.

"Oh, noth­ing," Tom Hurd said, and at that both he and his broth­er laughed. Even worse, Mark was grin­ning, as if he knew what they were talk­ing about. It was prob­a­bly some­thing he'd told them, Arnold thought dark­ly. Mark knew every­thing about him.

"Spit it out," he told Tom Hurd.

"Watch out or I will," Tom Hurd said back.

"I dou­ble-dare you," Arnold said.

Tom Hurd turned and sat still, like he was hold­ing his breath. "Maybe we're chickens…"

"Shut up, Tom­my!" Mark said from across the aisle.

"…but at least we don't live in a chick­en coop!" Tom Hurd fin­ished, his eyes wide.

For a moment nobody moved. Then Arnold stood up and swung one fist after the oth­er, punch­ing down at the cow­er­ing boy, not stop­ping until Mrs. Har­ri­son jammed on the brakes, throw­ing him for­ward, then back­wards into the seat. He was all through any­way, and he just sat lis­ten­ing to Tom Hurd bawl until Mrs. Har­ri­son had him by the col­lar, drag­ging him up the aisle toward the front of the bus.

Mrs. Har­ri­son was strong for a lady.

"Sit!" she said when they got to the stairwell.

Arnold sat on the top step, in the slushy dirt from the kids' boots.

"Who start­ed this?" Mrs. Har­ri­son said, look­ing down the aisle.

"He punched Tom­my!" Tim Hurd said.

"Is that true?" Mrs. Har­ri­son demanded.

Arnold was afraid he'd start cry­ing if he answered.

"Tom­my Hurd said Arnold lived in a chick­en coop!" Julie said then.

"Is that true?" Mrs. Har­ri­son said.

"Yes, Mrs. Har­ri­son!" Tom Hurd said. "But he still start­ed it!"

Mrs. Har­ri­son put her hands on her hips while a few more kids gave their two cents' worth. Then she said, "All right, I'll take it from here. First, Arnold, we do not hit on Mabel Harrison's bus. Ever. Is that clear?"

"Yes," Arnold whis­pered, his throat tight.

"Sec­ond," Mrs. Har­ri­son said, "we do not mock someone's sta­tion in life, ever. Is that clear?"

The words sta­tion in life hit Arnold like a big, icy snow­ball in the gut.

"Yes, Mrs. Har­ri­son," the kids all said.

"Tom­my?"

"I'm sor­ry," Tom Hurd sobbed.

"I'll need a note from your moth­er," Mrs. Har­ri­son said. "Yours too, Arnold. And you can stay right where you are until we get to school." She looked at all the kids, then stepped past Arnold and took the driver's seat. Soon they were ram­bling down the dirt road again, stop­ping to pick up Daryl Hop­kins, Emi­ly Pru­den and the Phillips kids. They squeezed past Arnold and moved to their seats. When they sat down the whis­per­ing began as the oth­er kids filled them in.

Out­side, fat snowflakes began to fall.

The bus reached the turn­around at the end of Lam­bert Road and head­ed back. When they reached Arnold's house all the kids looked out the win­dow. Arnold looked too, through the long, smudged win­dows in the door. You couldn't real­ly tell that it had been a chick­en coop, he thought. Arnold's grand­fa­ther and uncle had ren­o­vat­ed it after Arnold's dad had left, adding win­dows and shin­gles and a door. It had been a brood­er coop any­way, not a real coop like the emp­ty two-sto­ry build­ing behind it.

Arnold could remem­ber when the big coop had still been full of chick­ens. He could remem­ber the nois­es the chick­ens made. He could even remem­ber his grand­fa­ther chop­ping their heads off on a stump, and how they ran around head­less, and how every­body jumped out of their way so as not to get splashed.

The bus moved on, and some of the kids turned their heads, kept looking.

Then they were back to the tar road and every­one faced forward.

Dur­ing recess Arnold thought he heard a kid say, “Chick­en coop,” and he clamped a head­lock on the kid and rubbed his face in the snow until Mrs. Elliot ran up and stopped it. For pun­ish­ment Arnold had to spend the after­noon in the Principal's office, sit­ting at a table in the cor­ner. He didn't mind that so much. It was bet­ter than being in class, with every­body whis­per­ing. But when Mrs. Kim­ball shut the door and sat down with him and start­ed going on about his fam­i­ly, he wished he was back in the class­room. Mrs. Kim­ball was too nice. She had a long, gray pony­tail that sat on her shoul­der like a lit­tle pet.

"It's not easy grow­ing up with­out a dad," she told Arnold.

"Uh-huh," Arnold said.

"But you still have to behave your­self," Mrs. Kim­ball said. "Oth­er­wise you're going to spend your whole life in and out of trou­ble, Arnold. That's not what you want, is it?"

"Nuh-uh," Arnold said.

She let the pony­tail slip through her fin­gers back onto her shoul­der. She kept talk­ing, and Arnold pre­tend­ed to lis­ten. But he couldn't real­ly lis­ten or it would make him cry because her voice was so kind and she kept try­ing to look into his eyes. He nod­ded and said, "Uh-huh," and thought about oth­er stuff. He thought some more about the big coop. It was qui­et and dusty, and you made echoes when you walked around. There were these round met­al bins where the chick­ens used to eat, and all these weird lit­tle met­al spec­ta­cles lying around that the chick­ens had worn. It was fun­ny about the spec­ta­cles. His grand­fa­ther had told him that if the chick­ens didn't wear them, they would start act­ing creepy. He'd been fol­low­ing his grand­fa­ther around while he worked on the brood­er coop, ask­ing him ques­tions. With­out the spec­ta­cles, his grand­fa­ther had said, the chick­ens would turn into killers. You wouldn't think chick­ens could be so mean. They'd pick one poor chick­en out and gang up on it. They'd chase it into a cor­ner and peck at it until it died.

Arnold shiv­ered and stopped think­ing about the chickens.

The Hurds weren't on the bus going home – their moth­er had picked them up – and Arnold felt like things were almost back to nor­mal. He even sat with Mark and invit­ed him to come over after they got off the bus. Mark didn't know about com­ing over, though.

"Mum prob­a­bly won't go for it," he said.

"We've got cof­fee cake," Arnold said. His moth­er had brought it home from the shoeshop. Cof­fee cake was some­thing Mark's fam­i­ly nev­er had, because Mark's moth­er didn't think it was good for you.

Mark thought it over. "I'll try and sneak out."

The bus pulled up at the cross­ing and Arnold got off at the cousins' house. He crossed the tar road and walked back and forth out of sight behind the snow bank. He knew Mark had to make it look good. His moth­er thought Arnold was a bad influ­ence. Once Arnold had let Mark shoot the .22 that his dad had left behind and she'd found out about it. They'd tak­en it out into the woods behind the big coop and had shot it at a pine tree for a half hour. It had a scope that made the trees look close. But Mr. Hamil­ton from down the road had come down into the woods and had tak­en the rifle away. He'd told Arnold's moth­er and Mark's moth­er and they'd had to sit through a lec­ture from Mark's father. After­ward Arnold's moth­er had hid­den the rifle, although it didn't take long for Arnold to find it in a dark cor­ner of her clos­et behind the dress­es and coats.

Mark final­ly came out­side. He pre­tend­ed to go down to the field behind their house, then cut through the bush­es and ran around the cor­ner of the cross­ing onto Lam­bert Road. Arnold fell into step with him and they scuffed down the road. It was get­ting dark already, but Arnold could see a car parked in the space next to the path to his house. It wasn't Mrs. Soule's Belair, though: his moth­er must have got­ten a ride with some­body else. This was a white Fal­con. Arnold knew his cars pret­ty well. He and Mark walked up and looked in the Falcon's win­dows. There were clothes fold­ed and stacked on the back seat and hang­ing from hang­ers in the back win­dows. An army duf­fle bag sat on the floor. Arnold tried not to believe that his father had come home.

They walked toward Arnold's house and the big two-sto­ry coop behind it.

"Whose car?" Mark said.

"Some­body that gave her a ride home."

Arnold opened the screen door. They went inside just as the cur­tain part­ed in the door­way across the room and a tall guy with a mus­tache ducked out. The man blushed and grinned. "Well, hel­lo there!" he said. "School's out, I take it?" He was shov­ing his shirt­tail into his pants.

Arnold's moth­er came out. "You had to lal­ly-gag, didn't you?"

"Whose fault was that?" the man said.

Arnold's moth­er gig­gled and raked a hand through her hair. "I guess you caught me, Arnold!" she said. "But you didn't have to bring com­pa­ny! How are you, Marcus?"

"Ok, Aunt Carolyn."

"How's things up at the plantation?"

"Okay." Mark looked at Arnold. "Maybe I'd bet­ter go."

Arnold shrugged as if he didn't care.

Mark turned his eyes toward the kitchen table and the cof­fee cake cov­ered by waxed paper.

"Can Mark take a piece of that?" Arnold asked.

"Why not?" Arnold's moth­er said.

Arnold took the waxed paper off, cut a piece of the cof­fee cake and hand­ed it to Mark. Mark said, "Thanks! See you lat­er, Arnold. See you, Aunt Car­olyn," and took off out the door. The door slammed and Arnold saw him run past the win­dow, stuff­ing the cof­fee cake into his mouth.

"I guess it's time for me to go, too," the man with the mus­tache said.

"Call me?" Arnold's moth­er said.

Arnold left them hug­ging in the kitchen cor­ner. He walked through the liv­ing room and part­ed the cur­tain to his bed­room. They didn't have doors to their rooms here in the good old Brood­er Coop. "Doors are expen­sive," he snarled out loud. He flopped on his bed with his hands behind his head. After a minute or two he heard his moth­er walk up and say from out­side the cur­tain: "Arnold, I'm going for a ride, hon­ey. You be good, have some cof­fee-cake your­self. I'll be back in a lit­tle while."

"Where are you going?” Arnold said.

"Just for a ride. Be good, now!"

Arnold heard the front door shut. He went to the win­dow and watched his moth­er run up the path and get into the Fal­con. The Fal­con backed onto Lam­bert Road and rolled up the road toward the cross­ing. When it was gone Arnold went through the cur­tain into the liv­ing room and down to his mother's room. He ducked under the cur­tain and took the .22 out of the lit­tle clos­et where she hung her dress­es and sweaters. Remem­ber­ing about it had made him want to shoot it again. He took it out­side and around the house to the big coop. He'd hide it out there. She'd nev­er even notice it was miss­ing. The big coop's door hung on one hinge and there was snow on the floor­boards. There was no glass in any of the win­dows. It was cold. He ran up the stairs, hid the .22 behind a feed­er near a cor­ner. Then he went back to the house. He took the rest of the cof­fee-cake over to the couch, turned on the TV.

Arnold was lying down in the dark when his moth­er came home. He said, "Hi!", but she didn't answer. She went heav­i­ly into her room and banged around. Then it was qui­et. Arnold thought he'd bet­ter leave her alone, but after an hour he got too hun­gry. It was way past sup­per time and his stom­ach was growl­ing. He tip­toed up to her cur­tain and lis­tened to her breathing.

"Mum?"

She went on snoring.

"Mum?" Arnold said again, and she smacked her lips stickily.

"Mum!" Arnold said. "Can we have supper?"

"Can't a per­son take a nap around here?" his moth­er slurred.

Arnold part­ed the cur­tain and looked in. "I'm hungry!"

She threw the cov­ers back, stum­bled out of bed and came after him, but she got tan­gled up in the cur­tain and fell. Arnold grabbed his jack­et off a kitchen chair and ran out­side. He wait­ed, but she didn't fol­low. He zipped his jack­et, stuffed his hands into the pock­ets and walked up toward the road, scuff­ing through an inch of new snow. When he got to the street­light he could see his breath in the air. It had stopped snow­ing and the stars were out: bright pin­pricks clus­tered above. A cold breeze blew past, peck­ing his cheeks and the tips of his ears. He wished he'd had a chance to grab his cap with the ear­muffs. Down the road to his left he could see the Phillips' house – that used to be his grandfather's before he died – all lit up. He looked the oth­er way, toward the cross­ing. The big house was all lit up, too. He could walk up there; he'd done it before when his moth­er was on the warpath. He even took a cou­ple of steps that way, pic­tur­ing the big, warm rooms, kids sprawled on the floors. But then he remem­bered his aunt was mad at him. She'd prob­a­bly slam the door in his face. He stopped and looked back at his lit­tle house – dark except for the light over the door – and, loom­ing behind it, the two-sto­ry coop. At least he could get out of the wind. He trot­ted back down the hill and ducked past the cock­eyed door into the big coop. It was still and cold and dark. He climbed the stairs, feel­ing his way, and walked out into the open room. He remem­bered the .22 and retrieved it from behind the tin feed­er and walked around the coop hold­ing it like a sol­dier. But then he scuffed some of the spec­ta­cles with his heel and that was creepy, it made him think about the chick­ens gang­ing up.

Arnold stood still in the dark, hold­ing the rifle. He backed into a cor­ner by a win­dow and knelt, turn­ing to look through the scope at the cross­ing. The street­light on the cor­ner jumped into view. Then a car cleared the woods on the right and he fol­lowed it across the field and past the cousins' house until it dis­ap­peared behind the bush­es on the left. You could only see the top of its roof behind the snow­banks. He swung the bar­rel back and saw his aunt move past the kitchen win­dow. She was out of sight, though, when the .22 went off. It didn't make very much noise. It almost seemed like noth­ing had hap­pened until the door opened and Arnold's uncle came out and looked around. When Arnold pulled the trig­ger again his uncle ran back inside.

Arnold turned and slid down to the floor. He lay the .22 down, hop­ing he hadn't hit any­one. He blew warm air on his hands. After a few min­utes he could hear a siren in the dis­tance. He was inter­est­ed to see what would hap­pen next. He didn't care what it was, just so some­body came and got him. It was freez­ing in the coop, and it was get­ting creepy again, too. He couldn't stop think­ing about the chick­ens. It was hard not to when you were sit­ting there alone. In the cold and dark, with the siren get­ting loud­er, he imag­ined a big gang of them, mov­ing around with­out their spec­ta­cles. He could pic­ture them scratch­ing from room to room, get­ting clos­er all the time.

(orig­i­nal­ly pub­lished in Zoetrope All-Sto­ry Extra)

jim nicholsJim Nichols lives on a lit­tle riv­er in War­ren, Maine with his wife Anne. He has pub­lished fic­tion in numer­ous mag­a­zines, includ­ing Esquire, Night Train, paris transcon­ti­nen­tal, Zoetrope All-Sto­ry Extra, Amer­i­can Fic­tion, The Clacka­mas Review, Riv­er City and Port­land Month­ly. He's a past win­ner of the Willamette Fic­tion Prize, and was award­ed an Inde­pen­dent Artist's Fel­low­ship by the Maine Arts Com­mis­sion. His col­lec­tion Slow Mon­keys and Oth­er Sto­ries was pub­lished by Carnegie Mel­lon Press.

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Randy Johnson's Mullet Retirement

Did you know this fel­la, prob­a­bly the best left-han­der I ever saw pitch, inspired fans because he was 'white trash?' Go damn fig­ure. Mike Seely says, give a guy a mul­let, and he's trashy. OOOOOOkaay.

With Randy Johnson's retire­ment yes­ter­day and Edgar Martinez's com­ing up well short in today's Hall-of-Fame bal­lot­ing, it appears that it will be the for­mer who will be the first play­er to have spent a crit­i­cal por­tion of his career with the Mariners to enter Coop­er­stown. Whether John­son will choose to be enshrined as a Mariner is some­what uncer­tain, but we're bet­ting the fact that he came into his own as a Mariner, won his first Cy Young Award in Seat­tle, and spent more time and earned more wins here than with any oth­er club will end up tilt­ing the wind­mills in our favor ver­sus Arizona's (where he won four more Cy Youngs and his only World Series).

John­son is gen­er­al­ly regard­ed as the best left-hand­ed pow­er pitch­er in the his­to­ry of base­ball. But what I'll remem­ber him for is his sin­gu­lar appeal to what we'll polite­ly refer to as baseball's black-and-blue-col­lar sub­set of fans, referred to in snot­ti­er cir­cles as "white trash."

Base­ball fans have long loved their chew-dip­ping, stub­bly-faced, beer-drink­ing, Char­lie Hus­tle honkies [empha­sis mine]. Look no fur­ther than Pete Rose and the John Kruk/Lenny Dyk­stra-led Phillies teams of the early-'90s for evi­dence of this. But John­son took that appeal to a deep­er, dirt­i­er lev­el, espe­cial­ly when he played for the M's. Plen­ty of guys wore mul­lets and mus­tach­es dur­ing Johnson's prime, but none com­bined the two with such extreme enthu­si­asm as John­son. His mul­let was curly, greasy, and unruly, and his 'stache seemed as though it was ripped off theMarl­boro Man's face.

Son, I want to see you broach that trashy top­ic with the man in ques­tion. I urge you to. Since he's not in the Hall yet, he'll prob­a­bly look at you like some­thing he scraped off his shoe, and for­get about, it as opposed to beat­ing on your nog­gin, just a lit­tle. Which is what I might sug­gest if I were a chew-dip­pin'  beer-slurp­ing fan.

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Attention, Strapped Rednecks: Please Aim Your Guns Away From the Rare Wood Storks

OK, so this isn't the first thing I think of after fin­ish­ing this sto­ry, but name a minor­i­ty or oth­er eth­nic group (do red­necks qual­i­fy? anoth­er ques­tion, pro­jably) where a substitution–make your own– for the appro­pri­ate word  in that head­line might yield a non-offen­sive sentence?

The weird­est nook of Mia­mi-Dade Coun­ty is its unin­cor­po­rat­ed north­west cor­ner — a rur­al tract where gua­jiros pum­mel each oth­er at cow­boy bars, black-mar­ket horse meat is in high demand, and burned cars and oth­er refuse lit­ter the streets as if in some Mad Max hellscape.

Here's yet anoth­er strange atroc­i­ty: Hunters there are using an endan­gered bird as tar­get practice.

It hap­pens every win­ter, says Pepe, our man on the street who asked that his last name not be used. Rev­el­ers stream into North­west Dade to drink at the sprawl­ing ran­chos and dri­ve ATVs through the brush — and fire on every feath­ered thing unfor­tu­nate enough to cross their path. "They'll shoot any bird they see, for tar­get prac­tice," Pepe says. "Some­times they use auto­mat­ic assault weapons. They don't even pick up the carcasses."

Among the bul­let-rid­dled birds Pepe has found: sev­er­al endan­gered wood storks. The gan­g­ly white water bird is try­ing to make a Rocky-like come­back from severe­ly dec­i­mat­ed num­bers: In the '70s, only 2,500 remained. After hunt­ing was restrict­ed, an esti­mat­ed 10,000 wood storks exist today — a rel­a­tive boom that has Flori­da devel­op­ers lob­by­ing to down­grade the bird's sta­tus from "endan­gered" to "threat­ened" in order to ease habi­tat restrictions.

Save the wood stork here.

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Hey Everybody

I changed this blog over to Word­Press, which is eas­i­er to use, I think. Some of the old posts got AFU'd, but I'm fix­ing them slow­ly. So what do you think? In the future I could use pho­tos for this space too. Think it over.

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Cartin's Brick, fiction by Jarrid Deaton

My daugh­ter, Laney, she got preg­nant not long after her six­teenth birth­day.  Me and Nora were dis­ap­point­ed, sure, but we didn’t come  down on her with lec­tures or anger. We just told her that we’d help out as much as need­ed, but she had a whole new world of respon­si­bil­i­ties get­ting ready to crack open on her way before she was old enough.  Cartin’s father bolt­ed a week before Laney went into labor.  The first two years he mailed Christ­mas cards with fifty bucks in them, but then he was all the way gone.  Cartin was born pre­ma­ture, all shriv­eled and tiny.  He made it through the close calls with beep­ing machines send­ing  nurs­es back and forth at all hours of the day.  We thought Laney would do okay when we first saw her with him.  That didn’t last long at all.

By the time he turned one, Cartin was, for the most part, Nora's and mine.  We allowed for it because Laney made promis­es to go to the local com­mu­ni­ty col­lege and get a part-time job.  She kept her word on the job, hold­ing down a wait­ress­ing gig at Reno’s Road­house.  Some nights she wouldn’t come by to pick Cartin up.  Some nights she  would come by to get him stag­ger­ing drunk with some guy I nev­er got to see close up at the wheel of a truck that, by the sound of it, didn’t have a muf­fler.  If Cartin was sleep­ing,  the roar of truck would send him bawl­ing loud and red-faced out of what­ev­er dream he was caught in and it would take half an hour to calm him down.

Laney even­tu­al­ly stopped com­ing to get Cartin alto­geth­er.  It wor­ried me and  Nora, but we were more than hap­py to

have him around.  I’d watch him play in the back­yard and smile when I’d catch him star­ing up at the hills behind the house.  I knew he prob­a­bly heard a squir­rel head­ing for one of the tall trees, or maybe a rab­bit get­ting brave and mak­ing its way clos­er to the yard.

Papaw,” he said to me one day.  “What’s alive up there?”

Just about every­thing, bud­dy,” I told him.

The sum­mer he turned ten, I start­ed let­ting him wan­der around up in the hills.  I always  kept a close eye on him.  I’d been all over the area look­ing for mush­rooms and gin­seng, so I knew it was safe.  He’d spend an hour at a time roam­ing around before he’d make his way back to the house, dirty with scrapes from bri­ars up and down his arms and burrs stick­ing all over his back and in his wild brown hair.

The next spring, I took out a loan and built us a new house the land where my father used to have a farm.  It gave Nora plen­ty of room to plant her lit­tle gar­den and I’d always want­ed more dirt to call my own.  It was mine after my father died, but it didn’t feel like it belonged to me until I had a house on it.  We deed­ed the old house over to Laney and her live-in boyfriend, Amos, that I’d only met twice.  Nora told me he had a  good job with the rail­road, but, since Laney always bor­rowed mon­ey off of us, I doubt it was that good.

Not long after we moved in the new house, Amos drove over with a dog box in the back of his truck.  I walked out to see what was going on.  Amos went around to the back.

Come on over here, Olin,” he said.  “Look what I picked up for Cartin.  Got him a pal to play with.”

Amos let the truck gate down and opened the dog box.  A big mutt slinked out and took a ner­vous jump to the ground.  It looked like a cross between a col­lie and a hunt­ing dog.  It sniffed at the ground and made a few cir­cles around the truck.

Name’s Win­ston,” Amos said.  “Got him from a guy in Lex­ing­ton pret­ty cheap, all things con­sid­ered.  Promised to do a lit­tle roof­ing work for him, but I don’t plan on it.”

Amos laughed and squat­ted down to pet the dog.  It took a cou­ple of steps back and stared at him.

Hell with you, then,” Amos said.  “Tell Cartin me and his mama will come back over this week­end and see how him and Winston’s get­ting along.  We got some busi­ness to attend to down around Frank­fort tomor­row.  Take it easy, old man.”

They always had some kind of busi­ness to take care of in Frank­fort.  I nev­er nosed around enough to find out what it was, but I can imag­ine it would have pissed me off enough to have whipped Amos’ ass, so I just let it go.  I didn’t want to strain things between Laney and us any­more than she already had.

It was three days lat­er when I drove up the dusty one-lane road lead­ing to my house and saw Cartin with a wash rag held against his nose as he walked fast in the oppo­site direction.

"Cartin, what are you doing?" I asked. "Where's your grandma?"

"Damn dog bit me so I killed it," he said.  "I was look­ing for you.  I ain't sor­ry.  It bit me."

The dog wasn't dead, but it was hurt.  Cartin had cracked its head with one of the bricks  lay­ing in the yard, left over from the expan­sion of the house.

I looked at his nose, the bridge cov­ered in dried blood.  The dog had closed its jaws right between Cartin's eyes.

"I just tried to pet him," he said.  "He growled and I tried to back up but he jumped on me."

"It's okay," I said.  "Go in the house and get your grand­ma.  You need to head down to the clin­ic and get that looked at.

When Nora left with Cartin, I went inside at took my .38 from the top shelf of the clos­et.  I walked back out­side and found the dog hunched up against the back of the garage. One eye was closed and it growled at me and bared its fangs.

"Win­ston," I said.  "Laney. Amos."

I pulled the trig­ger and turned the crack made by Cartin's brick into a cave of blood, hair  and bone.  The dog was in the ground before he got back from the clinic.

Jar­rid Deaton lives in east­ern Ken­tucky. He received his MFA in writ­ing from Spald­ing Uni­ver­si­ty. His work has appeared in Under­ground Voic­es, Thieves Jar­gon, Pear Noir, decomP, Zygote in My Cof­fee, and elsewhere.
Posted in cartin's brick, Fiction, jarrid deaton | Leave a comment

Happy Holidays!

More con­tent in the new year. I'm going to be busy until then, though, turn­ing 40 and reeval­u­at­ing, uh, very impor­tant things, because I'm, uh, offi­cial­ly at what I used to con­sid­er mid­dle age.

Here's a song a dear, dear, friend of mine sent me today (thanks Sue!). To say I love it would be an understatement.

I hope you all are well and have fam­i­ly around you, if you want them there. Right now, I'm going out back of the house to piss my name in the snow. Because I can.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P37xPiRz1sg&hl=en_US&fs=1&]

Posted in robert earl keen, turning 40, xmas | 2 Comments

That's Right–Drug the Little Fuckers!

Who diag­nosed this three-year-old kid (ref­er­enced in the last graph) with bipo­lar dis­or­der?? Can some­one in the med­ical pro­fes­sions please tell me a way in which this makes sense? Three-year olds are all over the place men­tal­ly because they're, um, three-year-olds.
And it only makes the cake taste bet­ter to know poor kids get drugged at twice the rate of their rich­er coun­ter­parts. I imag­ine that hap­pens with adults, too, but I've not seen any research to that effect. Read for your­self, in the NY Times.
New fed­er­al­ly financed drug research reveals a stark dis­par­i­ty: chil­dren cov­ered by Med­ic­aid are giv­en pow­er­ful antipsy­chot­ic med­i­cines at a rate four times high­er than chil­dren whose par­ents have pri­vate insur­ance. And the Med­ic­aid chil­dren are more like­ly to receive the drugs for less severe con­di­tions than their mid­dle-class coun­ter­parts, the data shows.

Those find­ings, by a team from Rut­gers and Colum­bia, are almost cer­tain to add fuel to a long-run­ning debate. Do too many chil­dren from poor fam­i­lies receive pow­er­ful psy­chi­atric drugs not because they actu­al­ly need them — but because it is deemed the most effi­cient and cost-effec­tive way to con­trol prob­lems that may be han­dled much dif­fer­ent­ly for mid­dle-class chil­dren?

Posted in drugs for toddlers yay, medicaid, ny times | Leave a comment

Cow-Tipping, fiction by Mark Staniforth

The sight of all those school­girls’ legs unfold­ing off the bus­es at just past four o’clock every after­noon is almost enough to shut any­body up, except for Roscoe Williams when he’s got anoth­er one of them stu­pid ideas of his rat­tling around in his thick old head.

Squint­ing up at all that bare chick­en-flesh parad­ing right past you, it’s all you can do just to think straight, let alone talk. But Roscoe Williams, he’s so screwed-up with think­ing where his next drink’s going to come from he could talk his way through a sixth-form orgy just so long as there was a bot­tle of Super wait­ing on the oth­er side of it.

Maybe it’s because he’s so blur­ry-focused on the booze and his next means of get­ting it that the sight of all them shiny fawn thighs doesn’t seem so much of a big deal to him as it does to me. Me, I reck­on I’d hap­pi­ly trade in swig­ging Super all day long on the bus-stop bench if it meant even the small­est improve­ment of get­ting any pair of them edu­cat­ed limbs of theirs lolled around my neck.

This time I’m try­ing my best to focus on the long curve of Kel­ly O’Mara’s calves, smooth and sleek as a sports car bon­net and guar­an­teed to top-speed her out of this place just as soon as she’s old enough to get behind a wheel. Only Roscoe’s blab­bing in my left lug­hole about this week­end being a right ripe time to pull anoth­er of his ‘famous’ cow-tip scams.

Thing is, what gets me most isn’t so much Roscoe’s blab­bing as me know­ing how it’s going to turn out, no mat­ter how much I try and stop it. Ever since my din­ner-time drink­ing got me fired from the ani­mal feeds, I’ve been des­per­ate enough that there isn’t a whole lot left I wouldn’t do for mon­ey. Even most of those things would be tempt­ing if you waved a bot­tle of Super under my nose.

Me and Roscoe go back a long way. We met when his moth­er threw a par­ty when we were ten years old, snuck under the kitchen table and drank our­selves as good as uncon­scious on her cook­ing brandy. Some­times it seems the screw­cap hasn’t been back on since. Through it all, I’ve learned the hard way that Roscoe is exact­ly the kind of greasy-arsed bas­tard I oughtn’t to be lis­ten­ing to when it comes to the ques­tion of mak­ing up the next bunch of beer money.

So when he starts up with the famous cow-tip shit, I blink my eyes off all those per­fect bod­ies and drib­ble a spit on the con­crete and say, con­vinc­ing as I can, ‘bull­shit, Roscoe.’

Wayne-oh,’ sighs Roscoe. I hate it when he sighs my name that way, like he’s some kind of big-shot who can hard­ly low­er him­self to shape the words. The sun turns to shad­ow and there’s no need to look up to know it’s Pat­ty Jenk­ins who’s block­ing it out. She’s already replaced her school jumper with a tee-shirt say­ing ‘Frankie Says Relax’. It pegs the end of her bal­loon boobs then drops straight off, makes her look like some sort of slut­ty sand­wich-board evan­ge­list. She’s got tight scraped-back fos­ter-home hair and smells of wet tow­els and cheese and onion crisps. She sags down between us and pokes a Ben­son in her cake-hole. She eyes up the bot­tle of Super and Roscoe hands it over sweet as if he was giv­ing Kel­ly O’Mara a box of Black Mag­ics on Valen­tines’ Day.

All right?’ I say, but it’s Roscoe who’s got her atten­tion on account of the free slurp of Super and the always-like­ly offer of some more fat cash.

You fixed for tonight?’ says Roscoe. Pat­ty shrugs. She slurps and bends for­ward to itch an inner-thigh. She pass­es me the Super. I take one look at the fuzzed-up rim and pass it right back. She takes anoth­er slurp, pass­es it to Roscoe who drains the last two inches.

Have faith in the cow-tip!’ he pro­claims, stand­ing and toss­ing the emp­ty bot­tle of Super towards the vil­lage green bin and stomp­ing across the street towards the pub­lic lavs.

***

Lat­er, we’re in the Fox and Roscoe’s tip­ping the shots down Pat­ty Jenkins’s neck, wrap­ping her round his lit­tle fin­ger with what’s left of his charm and his cash. Strikes me there’s no need for Roscoe to be so gen­er­ous with the dou­bles, since Pat­ty would good as guar­an­tee her­self to any­one for keeps once she’s dosed up on Pern­od and Blacks.

Patty’s swapped her Frankie tee-shirt for her best blow-job clothes, a cheap black bra just about big enough to hold them in under a two-sizes-too-small crop-top that shows off her folds. The way she’s rub­bing up against Roscoe look­ing up at him with those big trust­ing eyes of hers, it almost makes me feel sor­ry for her. It doesn’t take a genius to fig­ure out what’s com­ing but I swal­low my morals for the thought of a pock­et-full of dough.

 ***

The tap-room’s full of boys with bare arms swig­ging pints like they know where the next one’s com­ing from. They’re here to give Jack­ie Bell a quaint old rur­al send-off. Jack­ie Bell’s hauled them up here sup­pos­ed­ly on some out­ward-bound week­end but truth is he’s been after the chance to rub our noses in it ever since he swanned off to that col­lege of his. He’s throw­ing twen­ties at Old Roy and Old Roy’s flap­ping about after them like a zoo-pond pen­guin at feed­ing time. It’s just as well we’re so prac­tised in mak­ing our own pints last all night or we’d be detoxed by the time we man­aged to catch Old Roy’s eye.

Roscoe’s got his eye on a cou­ple of like­ly lads. Reck­ons he’s like a lion pick­ing out the weak­est wilde­beest from the herd. Calls it his sixth sense and I have to hand it to him, it hasn’t done us too far wrong in the past, save the time he didn’t account for a scrawny-arsed runt being a cham­pi­on fly­weight. They’re well-dressed town­ie types and it’s easy to see who shits it the most when the pissed-up farm boys barge past on their way to the lavs. Roscoe flicks his head and heads off, pulls up a stool. I fol­low him. Pat­ty stays back by the juke­box, swivels her clack-shoes so her tits are spilling in their direction.

Roscoe nods at a pair of lads and asks if they can spare him a fag. The fat­ter one offers up a pack of pon­cey men­thols and I know that at that moment Roscoe’s gone and struck gold again. Roscoe leans in for a light. He nods his head at Jack­ie Bell lord­ing it up at the end of the bar and says, ‘known him for years. Couldn’t hap­pen to a nicer bloke.’

You can tell the pair’s ner­vous what with the prox­im­i­ty of Roscoe’s fucked-up face. Roscoe lifts his dregs and makes them clink glass­es. He clocks one of them’s wear­ing a Unit­ed pin-badge. When it comes to clock­ing stuff like that, Roscoe nev­er miss­es a trick. A few min­utes lat­er, we’ve got fresh pints lined up cour­tesy of the town­ies, and they’re embroiled in a red-faced three-way over who’s bet­ter down the Old Traf­ford wing, Jes­per Olsen or some oth­er cunt I’ve nev­er heard of. I’m look­ing over at Pat­ty wait­ing for the sig­nal, and I’ve half a mind to pull Roscoe aside and tell him a night on the beer’s enough for me with­out hav­ing to go through with all the famous cow-tip crap.

Roscoe flash­es me the wink which says I’ll nev­er see the end of it. He nods over at Pat­ty and draws their heads in and says, ‘see that bird over there with the tits? Best blow-jobs north of Wat­ford.’ He reach­es for anoth­er men­thol, sparks up. ‘Fact.’

They’re look­ing over giv­ing her the ogle. She gives them the cutesy wave. ‘You’re in there.’ Roscoe says it so they both them he means them. Truth be told, they’re not the types it looks like pussy comes easy for. The fat one looks down, embar­rassed. The oth­er meets her stare.

Just then, Jack­ie Bell flits past and Roscoe
pulls him over and steers his pint to the table and says, ‘good on you, Jacko!’

Hey-hey!’ says Jack­ie Bell, slaps Roscoe’s back. Roscoe used to be Jackie’s pussy-catch­ing mate till too many nights on the glue turned him into an ugly sniff-faced bas­tard. Used to bore me sense­less with sto­ries of dou­ble-team­ing sluts behind the Kwik Save. Now Jack­ie just treats him like anoth­er piece of shit ought to be stuck down the bot­tom of a brown paper bag.

Jack­ie says, ‘you’ve found your­self a right fuck­ing pair here, lads,’ and I can’t work out who it is he’s talk­ing to, us or the stag-do dick­heads, but either way know­ing we know Jack­ie seems to put the two stag-do dick­heads at ease.

Jack­ie gone, Roscoe’s back to drawl­ing on like a Match Of The Day pun­dit. Out of the cor­ner of his eye he tips Pat­ty the wink and she wob­bles over.

 ***

Long past clos­ing time we’re out in a field in the mid­dle of nowhere and I hate to admit it but Roscoe’s plan has worked like a charm. Get­ting the pair of them out of the pub didn’t present much of a prob­lem once Roscoe start­ed gab­bing on about quaint local activ­i­ties, and Pat­ty piped up about the cow-tip­ping right on cue.

It’s fair to say the fat one was a bit more reluc­tant to give up his seat in the thick warm pub for a spot of gal­li­vant­i­ng round pitch-black fields get­ting his box-fresh Filas all fucked up with ani­mal shit, but it’s noth­ing a well-placed hand on a thigh from Pat­ty couldn’t sort out quick-sharp. We pile in the back of Roscoe’s Corti­na Estate. It’s had the back down so long now the seats wouldn’t sit up if you tried. Roscoe uses it as a mobile bed most nights giv­en as he’s pret­ty much per­ma­nent estranged from his folks these days. Cold­er it gets, the more litres he gets through for insu­la­tion. It smells of old fags and stale piss and the bear­ings squeal like a yard of pigs as Roscoe bathes the pub car park in full beam. ‘Jes­per fuck­ing Olsen,’ he says as he backs out, shakes his head in the best fake awe you’ve ever seen.

Soon we’re bounc­ing up the pitch-black back-tracks so much it’s giv­ing me a stiffy and I’m hat­ing myself for it tak­ing just a few stu­pid pot-holes to get me horny about Pat­ty Jenk­ins of all peo­ple again. She’s squeezed in between the col­lege cunts in the back and if everything’s going accord­ing to Roscoe’s well-laid plans she’ll have each of her hands down their respec­tive box­ers by now and be twid­dling their no-doubt tiny nobs towards the point of splurge.

After more bump­ing and grind­ing than you get on the dance­floor of the Pick­er­ing Ritzy on your aver­age Fri­day night, Roscoe pulls up and half-turns and his teethy smirk is lit up by moonlight.

Cow-tip time!’ Roscoe says, and we all lamp out the car and feel our feet sink in pools of warm shit. The fat lad stops to light up anoth­er men­thol and by the look of his face in the match-glow he’s not all that thrilled with where we’ve took him. The oth­er one’s more perv­ing at the gigan­tic bounc­ing balls Patty’s got stuffed up her tee-shirt and they’re look­ing even big­ger in the moon­light glow. Patty’s looped an arm round both the boys and she’s steer­ing them off to the dark­ness as planned.

Roscoe hiss­es open a cou­ple of cans of Spe­cial and we clank them togeth­er and glug them down. After giv­ing them ten min­utes we creak out after catch­ing one or both of them in the act. Sure enough there’s the flab­by lad sil­hou­et­ted in the open field with his arms stick­ing out like a scare­crow and he’s mum­bling to no-one in par­tic­u­lar: ‘I knew it. I fuck­ing knew it.’

There’s a slur­py sound com­ing from a block of black on our right which we take cor­rect­ly to be a hedge, and clos­er inspec­tion reveals Pat­ty Jenk­ins down in her most con­ve­nient pose gob­bling the oth­er lad’s sweaty knob with his box­ers tan­gling his knees. Patty’s still got her mega-baps well strapped in which I can’t help feel­ing is a mighty waste on the lad’s part, though they do say some are inclined to save a lit­tle mys­tery for their lovemaking.

The rou­tine is for Roscoe to step out out and polite­ly inform the chap that in order to keep such a sor­ry and per­haps ille­gal activ­i­ty under wraps there may have to be a small ses­sion of finan­cial trans­act­ing. But some­how the sight of Pat­ty sum­mon­ing up such enthu­si­asm for the one-thou­sand-and-forty-third nob she’s ever had in her gob seems to rub Roscoe up the wrong way. So while the flab­by lad’s still stomp­ing around the field moan­ing about fuck­ing know­ing it, Roscoe bel­lyflops over the top of the hedge and slaps the lad out of his fan­ta­sy and calls him a paedo.

Pat­ty slops his nob out of her gob and wipes her­self on the hem of her upturned top and gets to her feet and gig­gles at her mucky whore knees.

The lad’s star­ing big-eyed at Roscoe going, ‘I don’t want no trou­ble, like,’ but Roscoe slaps him round the chops and sinks him in the mud. He goes, ‘she might be a dirty slut but she’s only fif­teen, like.’

The lad’s got his arms in the air and he’s start­ing to pan­ic. He starts to yam­mer about not know­ing, and it would look well fun­ny if it wasn’t so seri­ous because he’s plain for­got he’s still got his box­ers round his knees and his dan­glies dan­gling. Then while he tries to get up Roscoe slaps him back in the mud and he plants his bare arse in the soil with a slop.

The fat lad comes over with all the com­mo­tion and Roscoe calms a lit­tle and gives it the, ‘your mate’s been knob­bing my sis­ter and she’s only fif­teen,’ bit, and for good mea­sure, ‘what with her men­tal what-nots, I’m afraid it don’t look good.’

The fat lad squints through the gloom at Pat­ty like he’s check­ing if she’s drib­bling enough to pass for a spac­cer. Pat­ty leers right back at him and licks her lips.

The fat lad starts curs­ing under his breath again and he reach­es out his wal­let and Roscoe’s most peturbed when he finds the two lads between them can only sum­mon the pal­try sum of thir­ty-five quid between them and their cash cards are stuffed safe behind Old Roy’s bar run­ning up a fine tab.

Faced with the prospect of hav­ing a pock­et-full of  short change once he’s deduct­ed trav­el­ling expens­es and the cost of a cou­ple of four-packs of Spe­cial Brew and Patty’s con­sid­er­able pre-event bar bill, it doesn’t take Roscoe too long to get his radge back on. First he orders the thin one to kick off his air-bub­ble Nikes and the Levis from round his ankles and the box­ers from his knees, then he’s after his dress-shirt and the lad’s left clasp­ing him­self white and blub­bery in the nude. The fat lad’s got wind of what’s hap­pen­ing and he’s leg­ging it away over the field stum­bling as he goes, hap­py to spend the night tramp­ing out on the moors if he means he’ll avoid hav­ing to get his own pair of flop­py norps out in front of a lass. Roscoe gives the thin lad a boot in the ribs and the lad’s prop­er cry­ing now. ‘Fuck­ing hell Roscoe,’ I say, think­ing the lad’ll most like­ly freeze to death just lying like that, and on sec­ond thoughts Roscoe chucks him his shirt back, and I might say it’s one of the touch­ing things I’ve seen him do, only he spoils the effect by pulling out his car keys and chuck­ing them and his train­ers into the black­ness for the spite of it.

Roscoe’s fair rag­ing and we sit in the car in silence and nei­ther me nor Pat­ty has the courage to ask Roscoe for our cut. The car stinks of mud-shit and Roscoe’s got the Stone Ros­es on blast­ing which is total­ly wrong for the mood we’re in.

Roscoe swigs anoth­er Spe­cial while his lights search the road and I feel Pat­ty sob­bing in my armpit and I say, ‘you didn’t need to call her no dirty slut.’

Roscoe slams on his brakes and almost sends us arrow­ing through the wind­screen. He tu
rns and slurs, ‘get the fuck out of my car.’

Well the mood he’s in we don’t need no sec­ond invite, and I help Pat­ty out and he zooms off with the door still flap­ping, and Pat­ty sobs more till his red back-lights turn out of sight.

It takes us a fair few hours to make it back and those hours present plen­ty of time for think­ing. Instead of risk­ing wak­ing her old man at her place we head in the site sta­t­ic with the bro­ken win­dow catch that those of us of a cer­tain age been using for extra cur­ric­u­lar activ­i­ties for years. Pat­ty sprawls out over the stinky couch and starts talk­ing her fan­ci­ful notions about get­ting a one-way tick­et out of here. They’re tempt­ing enough notions all right and what with all that think­ing time I find myself swept up with thought that it’s not too late to make a go of it some­where else. Then I look into those eager-to-please blowjob eyes of hers and sud­den­ly I hate myself even more. Truth is I know how tonight’s going to end up, just like I know how things’ll end up next time Roscoe cools off and comes back round spout­ing anoth­er of them stu­pid ideas of his.

Mark Stan­i­forth lives in a small vil­lage in North York­shire, Eng­land. His fic­tion has been pub­lished in Night Train, Eclec­ti­ca, The Dublin Quar­ter­ly and Suss, among oth­ers. He has a blog at mark​stan​i​forth​.blogspot​.com.




Posted in cow-tipping, Fiction, mark staniforth | Leave a comment

New Content Coming Soon

Just let­ting you all know.

 I think it's a sign my family's get­ting old­er and old­er, or just not hunt­ing, or some­thing. No one got a deer on the first or sec­ond day, or at all that I've heard of. And I know the PA deer pop­u­la­tion is explod­ing and has been for some time. I nev­er got one. I had a chance a cou­ple times. My broth­er and I were right down behind the house at join­ing of our feed­er crick with See­ley Creek. I didn't have my mind in the hunt–I often didn't–so my broth­er tapped me on the shoul­der and point­ed across the water to the steep side­hill cov­ered in pine. A buck was skit­ter­ing his way down among the pine nee­dles and rocks, a cou­ple doe close behind. I can't remem­ber what I was hunt­ing with–probably my brother's 12-gauge– but I remem­ber draw­ing the bead down behind the front leg and wait­ing for the buck to stop at the bot­tom before he took off again. I wait­ed and wait­ed, in the way time turns like molasses before the shot, and real­ized I couldn't do it. I didn't want to do it. I liked veni­son, a great deal, but not enough to shoot and kill to get it. So I didn't shoot. My broth­er winked at me when I brought the bar­rel down, but didn't say any­thing. He didn't shoot either, but he has his own rea­sons for that. I don't know them.

As penance of a sort, I haven't eat­en veni­son much since then. Though I do love the mem­o­ry of see­ing the deer hang from the apple tree overnight, and then butcher­ing the cold car­cass on the met­al din­ing room table, see­ing my dad or my moth­er slide the knife into the meat on either side of the spine, and how the back­strap would go straight into the fry­ing pan with some but­ter, maybe some flour–I don't remem­ber exactly–and then out on a com­mu­nal plate, even while our hands were still bloody, and even though the car­cass wasn't near­ly done.

I have bad mem­o­ries too, like try­ing to force the shot-meat and the gris­tle into some­thing iden­ti­fi­able as ham­burg­er, which meant through the hand-grinder attached tem­porar­i­ly to the kitchen counter,and often com­ing close to break­ing the thing. That was my job, to grind.And grind. And grind some more.

Posted in hunting them, whitetail deer | 5 Comments

Books

I owe a whole shit-ton of you (mean­ing con­tribs) books. I've been so busy for the last two months I'd for­got­ten about that, uh, very impor­tant part of the deal for pub­lish­ing here. Please remind me in com­ments if I haven't sent you a book and indi­cate your pref­er­ence for fic­tion or poet­ry. Also send your snail-mail address to rusty.​barnes@​gmail.​com.

Posted in books, iou | 4 Comments